Let Go of The Haters and Losers – Fire Your Upline and Achieve Your Potential!
Leaders Are Created, They Are Not Born!
It doesn’t matter how old you are. It doesn’t matter what your circumstances are. It doesn’t matter how many times you’ve failed in the past or how much you’ve failed in the past.
What matters is, are you ready to step up now and become a leader now?
Haters and Losers
Experienced marketers will ALL tell you they have had more than their fair share of ‘haters’ and ‘losers’ giving them grief about whatever.
To folks new to marketing, it’s always a shocker and it’s a big reason people quit before they realise it’s just a minor obstacle that is easily overcome.
It’s human nature after all to want to ‘fit in’. To be accepted. To be liked and to be loved. But there’s another old maxim worth citing here…
“You can please some of the people, some of the time, but you can’t please ALL of the people all of the time.”
So why even bother to try?
When you’re first starting out in marketing, especially a great business like network marketing, you are going to be speaking and connecting with a LOT of people! Most of them will be great! Nice, normal people! But SOME of them will be thoroughly obnoxious and poisonous! Now there are fortunately some things you can do about the obnoxious, poisonous losers and haters…
1) Develop a mindset of rising above them, ignoring their comments, even if they try to conceal them as ‘good opinions’ i.e. they ‘know’ what they’re talking about blah blah blah “Rise above the good opinion of others” – no matter how well intentioned they might be!
2) Learn some skill sets that improve your ‘posture’ in the way you come across to people. A lot of barbed and poisonous comments come simply because we unintentionally rubbed them up the wrong way. Through experience and educating yourself, you can get better at how you relate to people online.
3) Accept that some (especially in the age of Social Media) are just going to be unpleasant and nasty no matter you say or do – this is THEIR problem (and has become part and parcel of the nature of social media)!!! Since they haven’t taken the time or the trouble to get to know you better – it CANNOT have anything to do with you!!
4) Develop a thick skin! This is really a repeat of my first point, but it’s just so important it’s worth re-stating! You are going to get messages from haters and losers. Whether or not they get ‘under your skin’ is YOUR CHOICE!
Finally, once upon a time, when I was far less mellowed and spiritual as I am now, if a hater loser messaged me I would sometimes reply as follows…
“I’m sitting here in the smallest room in the house (you know what that room is – right?), with your message printed out before me. Soon, it will be behind me! – Yours etc…”
Now of course, I’m not advocating that YOU should do that, obviously! I’m just well… mentioning it for your interest! (innocent face)
Fire Your Upline!
Here’s with Network Marketing Professional Eric Worre suggests you say to your upline…
“If you are committed to building a large and successful organisation, I’d like to encourage you to do something important. I’d like you to say goodbye to your upline. Call them up and say something like: “
‘I want to thank your for this opportunity, I appreciate it. Getting into business for myself was important and I appreciate you introducing met to a company you believe in and that I now believe in as well. But from now on, when it comes to building my business, I will use you as a resource but never as an excuse. I may call on you from time to time. If you’re available, that’s great. if you’re not, that’s okay too. I’m going to build my business and I understand one thing: it begins and ends with me.’
(‘Go Pro – 7 Steps to Becoming a Network Marketing Professional’ – Eric Worre)
Do I really need to say more?
Probably not, however, if you’re not yet convinced…
What do you think is the job of your upline?
a) To support and train you until you are successful in the business?
b) To be the leader of a team that you are proud to belong too and can edify to prospects?
c) To be so good or so bad at what they do that you are inspired to step up and become a leader in your own right?
d) All of the above?
I think most people would answer d) all of the above with the hope that in c), their upline is a ‘good’ one.
But I have problems with a) and b). Specifically, there is an underlying assumption that you are DEPENDENT on your upline. And as someone who is learning to be a ‘leader’, that is a major contradiction and obstacle to your success!
Most newbies to networking believe that a) their upline is there to train and support them is essential .
I don’t agree!
It’s NICE and it’s preferable by far, if you have an upline that provides good training and support – absolutely! But it is NOT essential!
(Note: by UPLINE I don’t necessarily mean your SPONSOR. It’s highly possible, even likely, that your sponsor, the person who brought you into the business, is only slightly more experienced than you with the company. THIS IS NORMAL & PERFECTLY OK – Your upline however, is an experienced individual or SEVERAL people above your sponsor who have been around long enough to know a lot about growing the business successfully)
What IS essential is that you know WHERE the trainings are that you need. How to attend or view them and where to get your questions answered. A GOOD upline will be able to tell you where the trainings are. They will help you with your ‘first steps’ to getting your business started, do three-way calls with you and will teach you best practices for duplicating your (and their) business.
Personally, I would NOT join a company where my upline wasn’t prepared to do that AND do it well.
BUT, suppose for a moment, my upline wasn’t very good! Is that a reason to leave the company?
In my experience, MOST people with a bad upline DO leave the company!
However, think about this. Whilst it’s tough when you have a bad upline. What REALLY matters is…
Are you with a GOOD company? and
Do your really understand ‘it begins and ends with YOU!’
Now the measures for what constitutes a ‘good company’ are many and varied and outside the scope of this article. I have written a free report about that (CLICK HERE FOR FREE REPORT)
However, are you a leader or a follower?
If you are TRUE leader i.e. you are prepared to do whatever it takes to become good at turning a profit in your business, including learning the leadership skill sets you need, then a bad upline is just an irritating obstacle to overcome.
By becoming the leader and displaying the kind of leadership skills they do not!
Remember. A legitimate networking company (I wrote about how to tell the difference here) is a level playing field. It doesn’t matter how long you’ve been with the company, anyone joining today can still become one of the highest earners in the company.
So if not you… who?
It’s tough if your upline is bad – but it is NOT a reason to quit!!
Find the trainings you need and do them! Learn the skills of duplicating your business and roll them out to YOUR team! Be the leader you know you are! And even if you loathe and despise your upline – let it go!! Just get on with building YOUR business!
But What if Your Upline is Good?
Their trainings and support are outstanding and they are always there for you!
Should you fire them?
Trust me on this… THEY WANT YOU TOO! Your upline knows that their job is done when you are successfully teaching and training your own team to successfully teach and train their own teams to recruit into the business and promote and sell the products. So why wouldn’t they want to be fired? You don’t need them anymore!!! I’m labouring this point for a reason…
Beware of False Guru’s
Sometimes, an upline becomes too big for their boots. Rather than teaching you to be self-dependent To find the trainings and skills sets you need to accomplish your own goals and to duplicate successful strategies throughout your team; they encourage you to become a devotee of theirs.
In other words, instead of teaching
‘Do what I do’ – they teach ‘Do what I say’.
The difference is subtle, but it’s critical. By ‘do what I do’ – they want to you to be a leader in your own right. By ‘do what I say’ – they want you to follow them foreverrrrrrrrr!!!
They do the latter for two very good reasons (for them!)
1) The ‘do what I say’ type of leader typically has their fingers in many money-making pies. And by building a loyal following, they can milk them over and over and over again for their hard-earned cash! Often the fake guru makes pots and pots of cash from their followers, by promising them they will get the same. The reality though is very different.
Typically the fake guru makes a killing and most of the followers get burned.
2) They are usually very ego centric. In other words – they like being ‘loved’ and ‘worshipped’. They respond well to compliments and lashings of praise. They encourage it! This is NOT leadership – this is just an ego trip. If you want to make good money from marketing, stay away from these kind of people. Of course genuinely good leaders can’t help it if they receive praise and the distinction can be subtle, so you will have to use good judgement in spotting the difference between a fake guru and a genuine leader.
So there we have it.
1) Learn to ignore the ‘haters and losers’ – Rise above the good opinion of others!
2) Fire your upline! – You’re in business for yourself – it’s up to YOU!
3) Beware of false guru’s – Learn from the best – but don’t worship and follow them blindly!
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Remember, if you want change in your life….
The Change Begins With YOU!
Robin J Emdon
Life Coach & AttractionMarketing Professional
Email: [email protected]